Four Steps to Happiness

Flitting through an extended part of the weekend papers over a bowl of bananas and shedded wheat this morning, (health options on Monday mornings in some part assuage the guilt of a calorific Saturday and Sunday), I stopped mid-mouthful in front of a particular article. The picture showed a woman's backside and legs sticking out of a wardrobe which could only be described as full. Next to this a picture of a very neat looking woman who is the author of a book, the ethos of which boils down to 'Four Steps to Happiness'.

I was impressed by the picture. Whoever this cupboard belonged to had actually managed to place things inside it; not only that, but the top half of her body was also in amongst the clothes, tennis racquets and so on, implying more room was to be had inside. Genius, she has persuaded someone to put all their things away, one of those aspirations that has become vaguer with time in our household.

Here in the celestial swamp we dry clothes outside on the line when the constant moisture permits, and if it doesn't, they are draped over clothes driers or bathroom heaters and in times of urgent need and mid-winter into the life-saving tumble drier.  The off-spring know that if an item of clothing is missing they should begin with the pile atop the washing machine, then move to the overflowing laundry basket that sits mocking the ironing board. Still no luck? The clothes driers may have odd socks on them, under them or beside them. Haven't seen said item for quite some time? Perhaps it's in one of two mountainous heaps (there are laundry baskets somewhere beneath them) behind the bedroom door. If shrieks of 'Mum' persist we begin the search again or go back to the beginning; it's amazing how many pairs of jeans, school shirts or, 'you know, that top', have never even made it into the dirty laundry but can be found somewhere between a bed-leg and a cobweb.

Four Steps to Happiness began with 1) Declutter and 2) Re-order. I have only cited the state of laundry in our house. Sports kit, school books, technical paraphenalia, dog beds, school bags, used mugs, soon to be put up smoke alarms (they've been sitting there for 12 months now), screwdrivers on their way out to the toolbox, flipflops on their way upstairs, hair ties and brushes, packing boxes, (full) - 2 columns and stacked three high,wrapping paper and the missing scissors...

This de-cluttering may take some time, perhaps I should move rapidly to step 2 and hope for half-way happiness come the next millenium! Steps 3 and 4? Sleep, more of it and Abstain from eating chocolate brownies - who is this woman?!