A wannabe Elizabeth Taylor

Hairdresser's salons: we go in to repair the tired locks, give them a bit of va va voom, to tame the unruly mop and, we hope, to emerge feeling a few dollars better than an hour or so previously. Why then do they provide such an agony of torment in the process?!

Was there ever a place you'd really rather not be spotted in?

B is for banks

B is for banks and, like D for drainage, the dealing with them on a day to day basis is listed under W for Wife. Most of the time this involves a quick check online, burying of head in hands, clicking a button or two and making a few declarations of 'no more...for a while,' before exiting the screen and adopting the out of sight out of mind method of daily accounting.

Top Gear should have a Top Ten

It is a well known fact that being behind the wheel of a car can alter the way in which a human being interacts with others. What continues to amaze me is the seeming transformation of many such mortals into a divine being. How else can their air of immortality, or, at the very least, a sense of being king of the road, be explained?

Our once quiet country lane is used morning and evening, and quite a lot in between, as a cut through between main roads. Ten, fifteen, years ago a few cars would trundle past on their way to join the rat race; nowadays there is a constant stream of those in a hurry whose need to use our lane is paramount and the speed at which they wish to do so of great import.

One of my regular morning encounters is with a driver who

Rice paddies the only answer

With news that an award winning West Sussex vineyard will be ditching its entire 2012 crop to ensure consistently high standards, comes confirmation that North America's recent mid-west drought has scuppered their wheat crops, Northern Europe's constant rain has ensured potato blight, peculiar apples and a dearth of perfectly formed vegetables. I am searching for ideas for cheap food sources for the coming winter months.

Pasta, a family staple, is clearly affected by the price of wheat, ditto - obviously - breads. All those animals feed on grain, what grain? There will be an air of extravagance with morning toast,

The Power of Packaging

What is it about a shiny can that says, take me, buy me, drink me, now?  I'm not a fan of fizz, excepting the bubbly stuff touted at weddings and produced to commiserate for birthdays, so have no particular desire to drink 30cl of chemically enhanced liquid.

Yet, time and again when I'm paying for fuel, calling in at a corner shop to buy a paper or a gallon of milk; rows of shiny cans will wink at me, daring me to walk past without opening the front of their display unit.

An inadvertent shop

It's birthday season here which usually results in last minute panics

Diesel download

Filling up at petrol stations is definitely one of those 'could be doing something better with my time' tasks. Quite why or how no one has invented a painless means of doing this that doesn't involve leaving the comfort of the road or one's own drive, beats me - owners of Smart vehicles and other electrically powered motors needn't make contact to discuss.

I know roughly how many miles to the gallon my car can manage, I know, too, from experience that it is probably best not to leave it until a garage can be spotted in the middle distance and then coast downhill, hoping that the impetus will be sufficient to power you to a neat stop beside the petrol pump, only to remember that the tank is on the other side of the vehicle and, no, there is no fuel left with which to manouevre the car. Feminists, I apologise, but there are times when it is simply best to look feeble and hope for help.

The average beep (now there's an advance in technology that I could do without),